Random jokes

[JDW]

<Cthon98> hey, if you type in your pw, it will show as stars
<Cthon98> ********* see!
<AzureDiamond> hunter2
<AzureDiamond> doesnt look like stars to me
<Cthon98> <AzureDiamond> *******
<Cthon98> thats what I see
<AzureDiamond> oh, really?
<Cthon98> Absolutely
<AzureDiamond> you can go hunter2 my hunter2-ing hunter2
<AzureDiamond> haha, does that look funny to you?
<Cthon98> lol, yes. See, when YOU type hunter2, it shows to us as *******
<AzureDiamond> thats neat, I didnt know IRC did that
<Cthon98> yep, no matter how many times you type hunter2, it will show to us as *******
<AzureDiamond> awesome!
<AzureDiamond> wait, how do you know my pw?
<Cthon98> er, I just copy pasted YOUR ******'s and it appears to YOU as hunter2 cause its your pw
<AzureDiamond> oh, ok.

[Roux Le Corps]

no way thats real xD

[JDW]

no way thats real xD

I kid you not my friend

[lav_coyote25]

figgures. rotflmao.

[JDW]

t0rbad> so there i was in this hallway right
BlackAdder> i believe i speak for all of us when i say...
BlackAdder> WRONG DUDE!
BlackAdder> IM SICK OF YOU
BlackAdder> AND YOUR LAME STORIES
BlackAdder> NOBODY HERE THINKS YOURE FUNNY
BlackAdder> NOBODY HERE WANTS TO HEAR YOUR STORIES
BlackAdder> IN FACT
BlackAdder> IF YOU DIED RIGHT NOW
BlackAdder> I DON"T THINK NOBODY WOULD CARE
BlackAdder> SO WHAT DO YOU SAY TO THAT???
*** t0rbad sets mode: +b BlackAdder*!*@*.*
*** BlackAdder has been kicked my t0rbad ( )
t0rbad> so there i was in this hallway right
CRCError> right
heartless> Right.
r3v> right

[JDW]

<DeadMansHand> haha, last night, me and pete went out to celebrate his engagement and got hugely drunk
<DeadMansHand> we got this great idea to bury eachother in the sand close to the water and see who would chicken out first
<DeadMansHand> took about a half hour, but the water got up to my face so i freaked and got out
<DeadMansHand> i looked around for pete and he must've chickened out before me and stumbled home or something heh
<DeadMansHand> What'd he say when he woke up this morning?
<Thirteen-> uhh.. he hasn't come home yet.. i thought he was staying with you?
<DeadMansHand> holy ****.
<DeadMansHand> i hope im wrong about what im thinking right now
<DeadMansHand> im going back to the beach to make sure
<DeadMansHand> if he gets home, call me, i don't want to be worrying about this
<Thirteen-> will do. you better hope he's not still buried, you'll be in deep sh*t.
quit: (DeadMansHand)
<Tyran> wtf? pete came home last night. Ken's going to be worrying about this sh*t all day
<Thirteen-> haha yea, but it will be fun while it lasts
join: (PeteRepeat) (pluney@ .IP)
<PeteRepeat> f****** ken
<PeteRepeat> ken... that idiot buried me in the sand last night, i ran off about 5 minutes to it, left him there to be an idiot
<quiqsilver> pete, ken didn't come back last night, i thought he was with you.
<PeteRepeat> oh ****.
<PeteRepeat> if ken shows up, make sure he doesn't know that im at the beach digging for his body. i don't want him to think i care or anything.
quit: (PeteRepeat)
<Thirteen-> rofl. Those 2 are going to get a huge surprise when they meet at the beach.
<Tyran> i can't beleive how perfect their timing was

[JDW]

DragonflyBlade21: A woman has a close male friend. This means that he is probably interested in her, which is why he hangs around so much. She sees him strictly as a friend. This always starts out with, you're a great guy, but I don't like you in that way. This is roughly the equivalent for the guy of going to a job interview and the company saying, You have a great resume, you have all the qualifications we are looking for, but we're not going to hire you. We will, however, use your resume as the basis for comparison for all other applicants. But, we're going to hire somebody who is far less qualified and is probably an alcoholic. And if he doesn't work out, we'll hire somebody else, but still not you. In fact, we will never hire you. But we will call you from time to time to complain about the person that we hired.

[BlueMaxima]

Bash quotes = silly; because I've read all of them

[Jorzi]

Me too (lol...)

[JDW]

Bash quotes = silly; because I've read all of them

Well they aren't for you then

EDIT: Fine I'll get better ones

[JDW]

This one's dedicated to BlueMaxima

Why wouldn't you take a duck to the bathroom? It might be "a Pekin"

What time does a duck wake up? Duh! At the quack of dawn....

How do you make a duck sing? Stick in the oven till it's Bill Withers...

What would you call a cat if it swallowed a duck? Well, a duck-filled-fatty-pus!

What does a duck eat with it's soup? Duh! it eats soup with quackers....

What would you call a cow with 2 ducks? Milk & Quackers!

Guess what happens when a duck flies upside down? Well....it quacks up!

Where would a duck go if it got sick? To the Ducktor...

What would a duck detective say to another duck partner? Man, I hope we quack this case!

What would you call a bunch of ducks trapped in a cardboard box? A box of quackers

What would a duck say to a pharmacist? Alright!, give me some chapstick & put it on my bill!

What would a duck say to a banker? I bet my bills bigger than yours......

What kinda oil would a duck use in their car? Duh!, Quacker State

Why would a duck cross a road? Because he is jealous of the chicken!

What does kid ducks carry their school books in? A Quackpack....

What would you get if you crossed peanut butter & 6 ducks? Duh!, a pack of peanut butter & quackers....

Why did this duck tell you all these duck jokes? You know! To quack you all up!

@BlueMaxima: Oh, found this page that may interest you as well. Well, at least I enjoyed it
http://www.flickr.com/photos/mquest/set ... 621704666/

[lav_coyote25]

how do you get down off a duck?

[JDW]

how do you get down off a duck?

Hmmmmm... Dunno

[lav_coyote25]

you dont!

[JDW]

good one!